so it's goodbye again

ok so you all know that hope is going to africa in a few days with my dad to do a medical clinic and such since she is to be a doctor...what you don't know is that i had a total breakdown today and had to leave school cause i freaked out about them leaving...especially my dad cause it's goodbye again to quote John Denver. i act all cool about it and such but i really do mind it when he leaves cause there is that stupid and treacherous voice in the back of my head saying he won't come back and that scares me a lot. and i'm also majorly tired and don't feel good on top of all of this so it's making me think that i'm making myself sick again from worrying and i missed being able to talk to mr. mac today cause i came home and tomorrow i'm missing the whole day cause mom wants us girls to go have a day before hope leaves and i sorta don't want to do it cause i would rather be able to talk to mr. mac before they leave so that i don't just burst into his room monday morning crying and saying.."there gone and never coming back!" cause that's how it would happen and there is no doubt about it. i cry every time i talk to anyone about anything serious and it bugs me because i never used to cry and that is a really long sentence...i feel almost out of breath.